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Sunday, January 29, 2006

A JinJab Joke Box Joke......The Rig Diver !

This is even funnier when you realize it's real!
Next time you have a badday at work... think of this guy... Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshoredrilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent itto radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana,who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.Hi Sue,Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad
day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so Ithought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not sobad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must boreyou with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at thebottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time ofyear the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this:We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece ofequipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightfultemperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, whichis taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I'veused it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to thebottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the backof my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like workingin a Jacuzzi.Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch.So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a fewseconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but thedamage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot watermachine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since Idon't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. however,the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thoughtwas an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of mybutt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five otherdivers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive.I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stopstotaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin mychamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearingnothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, withtears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and toldme to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put thefire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse itwould be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to yourself,"I love my job, I love my job, I love my job".

The Wizard found this joke at the JibJab Joke Box....find out more in the following post.......sometimes , hell ! , life is always more hillarious then fiction !!!

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