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Tuesday, January 31, 2006

The End of the Month !!!






Well ,
there's plenty of Worthless Knowledge for this month !
I've only heard from one classmate from my High School but after 40 years , what the f*** , so let's get ready for V - Day in Feb. THE WIZARD !!!!!

ROCK HARD PHUKET - The best place in the Universe! Patong beach fun, phuket nightlife, phuket travel information, nightclubs in phuket

The Wizard's job.....if you can call it that !!!!!
ROCK HARD PHUKET - The best place in the Universe! Patong beach fun, phuket nightlife, phuket travel information, nightclubs in phuket

Cinematical



Cinematical TheWizard is too toasted too ......discuss.......see what you thunk ???

Monday, January 30, 2006

Ang Lee Named Filmmaker of the Year - Yahoo! News


Ang Lee Named Filmmaker of the Year - Yahoo! News
The Wizard thinks with this award he may be kissin' Oscar soon !!!

Drug.....!!


Click on the word "Drug" below, don't forget your sound!

Drug

Not The Wizard's feelings necessarily !!!

The Ground Meat Cookbook - 204 Intriguing Recipes


The Ground Meat Cookbook - 204 Intriguing Recipes
The Wizard has no problem with his meat , this is for you guys who beat the meat till the Butcher comes ......and please don't let your meat loaf !!!

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Twin "Idol" Wannabes Booted - Yahoo! News



Twin "Idol" Wannabes Booted - Yahoo! News The Wizard is sorry that the Twins were busted out , so to speak , they had good voices ! Now only pix from the arrest and booking will be in there portfolio......Simon had a bad temper tantrum , but after seeing how bad some of these people are (on purpose , for sure ) who wouldn't go on a freak-out , I did feel bad for the lady rocker', who The Wizard feels should have picked a different tune for her audition and might have had a different outcome....Sin City should be interesting as always !!!

Randy and the Rainbows - Official Web Site



Randy and the Rainbows - Official Web Site
When The Wizard blogged this site some upgrading was in progress , it amazes me that these 1 HIT Wonders , are still out there touring !!!

DELSHOME


Randy & The Rainbows played at thr re-union......they should be about the Stone's age....their big hit was a song called "Denise"....I think somebody copied it ??? ( Google Time Out ) Well I'll look later , the little woman needs me !!!
DELSHOME The Wizard has found his High School Alumni site.....I went nuts emailing people I haven't seen or heard from in over......let's just say awhile....I got one reply and he wasn't sure if he could remember my name...then he wrote "is this a porn site".....I hope my reply with some facts , awakens his memory , the site did mine......WOW .....I forgot , almost , to mention my name was there as an unheard from but I was in contact by email with someone organizing our re-union , so he never forwarded my request to announce at the party , on where I was , I don't think he was in my graduating class !!!

Women - Can't Live with'em.....


Can't live without'em....unless your gay ! Then you can have it both ways....not to mention , sharing clothes !!

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.> > >Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.> > >Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.> > >Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.> > >And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
WOMEN'S REVENGE
Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to> > >purchase.> > >As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television> > >set in her purse.> > >"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.> > >"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and > >I> > >figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.">
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) I know I'm not going to understand women.> > > I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,> > > pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,> > > and still be afraid of a spider
MARRIAGE SEMINAR
While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,> > >Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, "It is essential that> > >husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes."> > >He addressed the man, "Can you name your wife's favorite flower?"> > >Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's> > >Pillsbury, isn't it
CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles.> > >The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers> > >that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.> > >She directs him down the correct aisle.> > >A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton> > >balls and a ball of string on the counter.> > >She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for> > >your wife?> > >He answers, " You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the> > >store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of> > >tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much > >cheaper.> > >So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.> > >> > > ( I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. > >An> > >earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to> > >concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules,> > >goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"> > >"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a> > >day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.> > >The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat> > >everything to men...> > >The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid> > >and so beautiful all at the same time.> > >" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.> > > God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;> > > God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who> > >should brew the coffee each morning.> > >The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first,> > >and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."> > >The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you > >should> > >do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee. "Wife> > >replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the> > >man should do the coffee."> > >Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."> > >So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at> > >the top of several pages, that it indeed says.........."HEBREWS"

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN......HANDLE IT !
A funny bunch , but The Wizard wished the lady hadn't used so many bulletts , this also came from the JibJab Joke Box , look for posts below for info on joining !!!

No Surprise: Thailand is World's Best Tourist Country


No Surprise: Thailand is World's Best Tourist Country The Wizard will totally agree....it's one of the best destinations he's ever been as a tourist....living here is great too , but it's like anywhere you live , home is home ! When you're a tourista you see things in a different perspective......Oh , Auntie Emm , there's no place like home !!!

A JinJab Joke Box Joke......The Rig Diver !


This is even funnier when you realize it's real!
Next time you have a badday at work... think of this guy... Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshoredrilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent itto radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana,who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.Hi Sue,Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad
day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so Ithought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not sobad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must boreyou with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at thebottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time ofyear the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this:We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece ofequipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightfultemperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, whichis taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I'veused it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to thebottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the backof my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like workingin a Jacuzzi.Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch.So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a fewseconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but thedamage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot watermachine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since Idon't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. however,the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thoughtwas an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of mybutt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five otherdivers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive.I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stopstotaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin mychamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearingnothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, withtears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and toldme to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put thefire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse itwould be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to yourself,"I love my job, I love my job, I love my job".

The Wizard found this joke at the JibJab Joke Box....find out more in the following post.......sometimes , hell ! , life is always more hillarious then fiction !!!

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Ex-Member of the Supremes Eyes Imposters - Yahoo! News


Ex-Member of the Supremes Eyes Imposters - Yahoo! News
The Wizard believes Mary Wilson may have a good argument , after all , maybe someone out in Webville could be impersonating Big Bill 947 !!!

JibJab.com


Bump !!
JibJab.comWell these guys are at it again ! The Wizard urges all the JibJabbers out there , to check out my Joke Box entries....if your not a member yet , maybe you'd like to join , this latest fun time has JibJabbers loading up our Jokes to our own Joke Box Page , the guys also have offered a $5,000 prize (read the rules at the site for more info). The Wizard won a gift certificate last month on Face-Off , but this one would get me to a dentist and a full physical for The Wizard .
The other cool thing is I get to let you see some really funny videos along with some other funny shit , that I can't post here....I'll most likely be bumping this post up every few days , hoping for my readers to join and click on my Joke Box page. So that's the whole shebang...take a look if you like !!!!!

January 23, 1973 | The Onion - America's Finest News Source



January 23, 1973 The Onion - America's Finest News Source

BBspot - Geek Parents Using Cooling Technology Instead of Medicine to Lower Fevers


BBspot - Geek Parents Using Cooling Technology Instead of Medicine to Lower Fevers Whose brain-child was this idea.!!!

The Condiment Packet Museum




The Condiment Packet Museum There is a good chance The Metropolitan Museum of Art will suffer thru the rush to this ......Museum's fartifacts ......this may be The Wizard's first nominee for THE WORTHEVENLESS , an award of ignoble and draffish proportion ; The Wizard will thow at some lucky perpertrator of shite at year's end......your welcome to email me your picks for this oxymoronic achievement....if you win I'll send you something of over - abundantly worthless distortion !!!

Friday, January 27, 2006

Jimmy Barnes - The Official Web Site





Jimmy Barnes - The Official Web Site Now alot of people may not have ever heard of Jimmy Barnes......The Wizard hadn't really until I came to Thailand.....now if your Aussie or pretty much anywhere there is an Aussie presence , more then likely you will have....Remember the Michael Keaton movie "Gung-Ho" , if you saw that you heard JimmyBarnes singin' the song "Workin' Class Man" ....Okay don't wreck your brain trying to remember it !
The Wizard being a big fan of Soul Music highly recommends this Artist especially his "Soul Deep" cd....now don't get me wrong , all of his stuff is good and Rocks , try to find Greatest Hits of COLD CHISEL , this band really were and still are a big name Down Under.....Ok , just went to Amazon and they got COLD CHISEL Best of , it's an import , so a little costlier , but its Classic stuff so go to my Amazon.com link , all the way at the bottom , so I make a commission....so far I've had the link there for a year , I got a financial report today , The Wizard has $.80 cents in commissions ! Damn , they ain't sendin' a check yet !
So do yourself a favor , grab some Barnsey music , that's his wife and daughter in the pix ( his wife is Thai ) !!!

STD Warning!


The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of Sexually Transmitted Disease.
The disease is contracted through dangerous and high-risk behavior. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim and pronounced "gonna re-elect him." Many victims contracted it in 2004, after having been screwed for the past four years.
Cognitive characteristics of individuals infected include: antisocial personality disorders, delusions of grandeur with messianic overtones, extreme cognitive dissonance, inability to incorporate new information, pronounced xenophobia and paranoia, inability to accept responsibility for own actions, cowardice masked by misplaced bravado, uncontrolled facial smirking, ignorance of geography and history, tendencies towards evangelical theocracy, categorical all-or-nothing behavior.
Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed at how this destructive disease originated only a few years ago from a Bush found in Texas. :-)
Thanks to Bonsai guy for this impotent info on this terrible plague.....maybe it's a mutation strain from the DoDo bird !!!!

Nation's Snowmen March Against Global Warming | The Onion - America's Finest News Source



Nation's Snowmen March Against Global Warming The Onion - America's Finest News Source First the Snowmen.....What's next ? Santa's House at the North Pole !!!

Panda Bears on Yahoo! News Photos


Panda Bears on Yahoo! News Photos
Rumor has it the male panda played Marvin Gaye's "Let's get it on".......they now reside here in Thailand !!!

Thursday, January 26, 2006

:: inxs.com :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::



:: inxs.com ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: The tour with new vocalist J.D. Fortune has started.....The Wizard wishes them good fortune !!!

MARTY CASEY & LOVEHAMMERS



MARTY CASEY & LOVEHAMMERS As The Wizard called it on RockStar : INXS , Marty is on his own and rockin'.....true to their word he's out on tour opening for INXS.......I looked in on MSN Music , which featured INXS as Artist of the Month . They had a poll for next month's AOM with Marty and his band in some heavy company , but when I viewed the results , they were way ahead of everybody else . The Wizard thinks his vote might be the only male vote on the poll , for sure the only over 40 one !!!

Do "beer goggles" really exist?



Do "beer goggles" really exist? The Wizard will personally testify it does ?

Cryptomundo.com for Bigfoot, Loch Ness, and More



Cryptomundo.com for Bigfoot, Loch Ness, and More Cool name.......definite worthless pursuit !!

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Uriah Heep



Uriah Heep

Geez , I saw them in New Orleans in the early 70s......they'll be in Bangkok next month......I'll bet they're still kick ass R&R'llers , even now !!!

http://www.thaiticketmaster.com/

GREETINGS FROM NEW ORLEANS




GREETINGS FROM NEW ORLEANS
The Wizard posted these postcards but they have nothing to do with this really cool idea that this site is about....but acidentally the Sousaphone player in the first postcard is an old friend from N.O. named Anthony !!!

Flock of Dodos

Not exactly a flock of pix !

Flock of Dodos
A great name , even if they are extinct....maybe someday , somewhere there will be a Flock of Humans site , since we're bent on blowing each other up !....but enuff of that , we're still here and this site has an interesting trailer on ....!!!